The following is adapted from Dream Architecture.

As financial advisors, we have met with a lot of people who have struggled with a lack of support from the people in their lives. And, while there’s no doubt that others can impact your ability to achieve your dreams, what about that person looking back at you in the mirror? To what extent do you support and encourage yourself?

Often, people are their own worst enemies: the biggest limitation we typically have is the six inches between our ears—our minds. Fear, self-doubt, and uncertainty can prevent us from achieving our potential and our dreams. Negative self-talk is detrimental, too. Would you allow anyone to talk to you the way you talk to yourself? Probably not!

We all need to discover where and how we are limiting ourselves. And, we need to get out of our own way and allow ourselves to succeed. Luckily, with these six strategies, we can do just that.

#1: Start on a positive note

It’s important to start each day on a positive note. Adopt a routine of reading, watching, or listening to positive material. You can expand on that time by setting intentions that will move you closer to what you want most.

Some suggestions to do this—and to get yourself into a positive mindset—are to meditate, set your intentions, and be present. You can also make it a point to do everything with purpose, find love within yourself and others, move your body, and invest in your passion.

All these activities contribute to your personal well-being. The time you take each morning is for you alone—time to focus on what you really want out of life and how you will achieve it. It doesn’t necessarily matter how you go about this, as long as you commit to a routine and follow it every single day. Use the ideas above as guidelines and find something you can stick to.

#2: Exercise regularly

All the components of a morning routine are important, but exercise is especially critical in improving your physical, mental, and emotional health. Many studies show, for example, that exercise diminishes the effects of depression. 

According to Dr. Michael Craig Miller, assistant professor of psychiatry at Harvard Medical School, the benefits of exercising don’t end there. It also starts a biological cascade of events that results in many health benefits, such as protecting against heart disease and diabetes, improving sleep, and lowering blood pressure. 

Like the other components of a morning routine, exercising can become a habit over time. It might be difficult to stick to your routine at first. But if you commit to it for, say, a month, then at the end of that month, it’s likely that your routine has become a natural part of your morning that you look forward to. 

Consistency is the key! Do these activities every day, and they will become positive habits that benefit you in many ways. Start small, and then build from there.

#3: Focus on what matters most

During your morning routine, focus on your purpose and plan your day in a way that intentionally moves you toward that purpose. Whatever life stage you are in, we think you will benefit from adopting a morning routine.

Now, of course things happen that are beyond our control, and these circumstances can delay our progress. We certainly saw that happen in 2020 like no other time in recent history. But if you know what you want, you will find a way to move past the obstacles that life throws at you. If you don’t know what you want and what your purpose is, then external forces can cause you to lose your way completely.

It’s easy to get distracted when life is coming at you fast. Sometimes, it’s hard not to let everyday noise and hullabaloo take our focus off our goals. 

Try to tune out those distractions so you can focus on what you want most and what actions you need to take to move toward those dreams. Once you set your goal and figure out the steps you need to reach that goal, don’t let anything distract you from completing those steps.

#4: Practice gratitude

Your morning routine is an ideal time to focus on your dreams. Visualize them, plan them, and write down actions you will take that day to get you there. You might be amazed at how much progress you make toward what you want most in life, through the simple act of writing it down and placing intentional focus on those desires.

We know from personal experience that if you focus first thing in the morning on how to accomplish your goals, this will set the path for your day, which, in turn, sets the path for your week, your month, your year, and so forth.

In 2017, we published a daily journal titled Imagine. Act. Inspire. We designed it specifically for getting focused on what’s most important to you. Each day starts you off with a positive quote, to help you practice positive thinking. There is also space to write down two gratitudes and three “to-do” items for the day. Taken together, this combination of positivity, gratitude, and mindful preparation will help you start the day on the right foot.

#5: Be present

Many times, we get in our own way by constantly thinking, and maybe even worrying, about all the stuff we need to get done. We don’t allow ourselves to just be present and enjoy the moment.

We have seen people who are newly retired have a difficult time winding down from their frenetic careers. They have lived their entire lives reacting to the hustle and bustle of work and raising families. They have never learned to just be present and think about what they want most. 

It’s great to be a high achiever, but don’t let the act of chasing achievements rob you of the joy of profoundly simple moments enjoying your life. Sometimes we need to just take a deep breath and let things fall into place, without trying to control them.

#6: Be willing to say no

We absolutely believe in giving to others. However, sometimes it’s possible to give so much that you are causing yourself harm. 

Burnout is a very real phenomenon, and it often manifests when we’re making too many “withdrawals” from our personal bank of energy and not making enough “deposits.” Although it’s admirable to give to others, be careful you don’t give so much that you deplete the stores of energy you need to move toward your goals.

In many cases, the solution to burnout is to simply say no. Be selective about the committees or boards you serve on, the favors you do for friends and neighbors, and the help you give your loved ones. Say no to people, obligations, requests, and opportunities that you’re either not interested in or will not help you get to where you want to go. 

When we say yes to everything, we need to ask ourselves, “Who am I really trying to please?” If you are volunteering for everything because you think you are not enough as you are, that is an example of getting in your own way. Saying no doesn’t make you selfish; it just means you’re focused. To live a fulfilled life requires making wise choices about how you spend your time, energy, and money.

Get out of your own way

No matter what stage of life you’re in, if you want to build a life you love and find success, you have to be able to get out of your own way. Luckily, doing that doesn’t have to be hard; it just takes some practice and a willingness to commit.

So, establish a morning routine. Exercise, practice gratitude, and stay present in the moment. If you do these things—and the other strategies listed here—you’ll soon find that you start each day from a place of positivity. Before you know it, you will be reaching the goals you set for yourself.